Fear: the Biggest Roadblock

Posted on April 14, 2010
Filed Under General, psychology of success | View Comments

When I’m speaking to people about the implementation of their Big Ideas, we brainstorm the things that get in the way.  People always start with things like: ‘not enough time’ or ‘not focused enough’.  But sooner or later, it always comes around to fear.  Afraid of failure, afraid of success, afraid of being judged, afraid of making a mess of things like I did the last time, afraid I’m right and I’m a total loser….

So fear is a big one for all of us.  What happens to our bodies when we’re afraid?  Simply, we go into the fight-or-flight response, controlled by the hypothalmus, otherwise known as the reptilian part of the brain.

It has it’s important uses, of course, but for the Idea Implementor,  this is not the part of the brain best used for creative thought or innovation.  In fact the hormones that get released by the hypothalmus directly INHIBIT creativity and innovation.

Men and women related to fear differently.  Women tend to become nurturing and social when that FOF response is triggered.  Men tend to get aggressive.  In addition to the gender differences, there are personal differences in what your inclination is when you experience stress.

Like most of these kind of responses, they are largely subconscious.  So, since you are going to face fear as you implement your ideas, what is the best thing you can do in the moment to keep making the most powerful choices possible.

My teacher,  Mary Hulnick (www.universityofsantamonica.edu) tells this story.  She was home alone in her gated community in Southern California, no one but the cat.  It was evening after dinner in the winter, dark, cold and lonely.  She heard a noise outside and thought she saw a shadow moving at the gate.  Mary become terrified.  But being a spiritual teacher, she didn’t want to react to something that might or might not be real.  She knew she was FEELING fear, but wasn’t clear on what ACTION to take.  So she sat down and went into a deep meditation to seek the answer from within.

As she tells the story, she awoke several hours later, realizing she’d drifted off, and the feeling of fear past.

Meditation is a great reaction to the experience of fear and stress.  That doesn’t mean she might not have come out of the meditation and decided to call the police.  Meditation doesn’t negate action.  It just moved her out of the FOF part of the brain, the non-creative part, and into the part that was able to see solutions, that is intuitive and wise.

So, the best thing to do when you realize you’re afraid?  Stop, breathe, perhaps meditate…in a word…nothing.

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